Marriage is the most important aspect of every couple. In fact, almost all women spend their time fantasizing about their weddings as the happiest day of their lives.
However, there is a problem of an overwhelming aftermath that offsets all positive feelings felt during the event. Such condition is known as postnuptial depression.
WHAT ARE WEDDING BLUES?
It is a modern phenomenon that has gone very widespread. It ranges from vague discontent to full- scale depression. Left untreated it can go on indefinitely, getting more ingrained, speculated by most psychiatrists.
Both grooms and brides are vulnerable to being hit by the blues, but women are more likely to be affected as they tend to have a stronger emotional investment in marriage. The expectations before and after the event coupled with the financial toll of the wedding’s expenses fuel the negative feelings in the couple’s hearts and minds.
According to Linda Blair, a clinical psychologist at the University of Bath, “Post-wedding blues are becoming more common, because people’s expectations of a one- off solution to their problems are higher.”
This was agreed upon by Monica Lanman, who provides psychotherapy sessions for couples at the Tavistock Marital Studies Institute in London, as she stated that many victims find it difficult to confront their depression. She says, “Admitting you feel wretched after so much time, money and attention has been spent on you is too hard for most people to do.”
THE BEST WAYS TO CONQUER DEPRESSION
With enough determination and personal effort, newlyweds can overcome the underlying misery after the wedding day.
1. Discover a new passion
Find yourself a new way to pass your time. Indulge in several hobbies – even risk the fire to get into new interests. Try learning different kinds of dances, knitting, painting, etc. Give yourself an interest to be passionate about. Focus your time and will on these activities, even better to start doing such activities before your wedding to make the transition easier and better on the aftermath of the event.
2. Do things with your new partner
Spend time with your husband or wife to discover new ways to enjoy each other’s company. Create a lasting bond during such time because you are going to be together for the rest of your life.
3. Talk to the older married couples
Share experiences and seek advice from older married couples, from your relatives to your friends to chatting other couples in the Internet. Remember that you are not alone in have such feelings after the wedding. Reach out to the people who can help you cope with the adjustment of transition to a new stage of your life – marriage.
4. Finish all post wedding tasks
After your honeymoon, try to finish all the necessary tasks on the wedding such as wedding pictures, thank-you cards, etc. Get them done as soon as possible so that you can focus on your daily routines of married life.
Give yourselves the well-deserved break from all the tiring activities related to the wedding. Set aside a time for relaxation to ensure that you will not burn out from all the stress.
6. Keep the fires of romance burning
Don’t forget to fuel the feelings in your heart with efforts to appreciate each other’s loving company. Secure schedules for dates where you do something special together – either a candlelight dinner at home or a scenic stroll in your favorite place. Talk and relate to each other’s interests all the more after you’re married. Take to heart that you two are bound to be together until the end of your lives – or when one of you breaks his vows – as you promised during your wedding ceremony.
Do not let post wedding woes ruin the first months of your married life. The best way to conquer them is to help each other, as a couple, in your adjustment to a new and exciting stage in your lives where you will begin spending lifetimes together and building a family.